Editor's notes: Splice the mainbrace

Today, I'm talking about two common issues with sentence structure: run-on sentences/comma splices and fragments. Now, there is advice out there about these problems. But often, writers don't realise they're even doing it, so I'm going to explain what they mean, how to avoid them, and, in the case of fragments, why you might sometimes want to stick two fingers up to the rules. Fragments in particular are something I use a lot in my own writing, but have learnt to be aware of and use sparingly.

What's a comma splice? She crawled up the bed and positioned herself over him, her hair brushing his face, she was ready for him. 

The second comma is where the splice occurs. The first is okay, because 'her hair brushing his face' could not stand alone. To stand alone it would have to say: Her hair brushed his face. There'll be some fancy name for it, but, get this, I don't know that fancy name. I went to school in the eighties and although I know what's correct and what isn't, I don't always know the names for these things. I'm hoping I can make this admission now, four posts into my 'Editor's notes' series without entirely undermining my credibility... Maybe it's got something to do with gerunds. Anyway, 'she was ready for him' is a complete sentence with subject, verb and object. So you can't just split it from what has gone before with a comma. You need a semi-colon, if it's very closely related to what has preceded it. Otherwise, you need to finish the first part with a full stop and start a new sentence. 

She crawled up the bed and positioned herself over him, her hair brushing his face; she was ready for him. 
or
She crawled up the bed and positioned herself over him, her hair brushing his face. She was ready for him. 

What's a fragment? He made the proposal over a bottle of whisky. Which may have had something to do with us agreeing to it. Now that I think about it. Soberly.

The second, third and fourth sets of words which start with a capital letter and end with a full stop are all fragments. They are only pretending to be sentences. To be strictly correct, the one beginning 'Which' should be part of the previous sentence: He made the proposal over a bottle of whisky, which may have had something to do with us agreeing to it. The part beginning 'which' is a subordinate clause. Ooh get me and my grammatical terms; I had to Google it. 

To make the rest into 'proper' sentences, you'd have to do something like this: I realise this, now that I think about it soberly. 

But this is where I'd stick two fingers up to the rules and keep it all just as I first wrote it. I feel like a rebel, somewhat get me Johnny Rotten's phone number. Incidentally, although the phrase 'splice the mainbrace' may have originally referred to an emergency rope repair on a ship, it is now an order of extra drink for a crew. 

I'll be having a wee break for my next post, because I'm due to review Alison Tyler's Dark Secret Love on October 27th, but I'll be back after that to ask if you're ejaculating in my general direction. All my editing and proofreading info is at www.tillyhunter.co.uk.

DIY Editing Tips

I know how it is. You’re writing your first novel or starting off with some short stories to submit to anthologies. You don’t have the money to pay for an editor or proofreader. So at the same time as doing a very 'soft' launch of my editing/proofreading business over at www.tillyhunter.co.uk, I bring you some tips for doing it yourself.

1. Three-stage editing
Once you've wrestled your first draft into shape, I see the editing process as having three stages. First up comes editing for what you've said, the content and plot, making sure there are no holes in the storyline, getting all the detail you want in your setting and characters’ backgrounds, making sure you've followed the theme strongly enough if you’re writing for a particular submissions call. Secondly, you've got the editing for how you've said it - language and readability. This means cutting superfluous words, rewriting where you have repetition, questioning your metaphors, checking whether adverbs and adjectives could be cut if you used stronger verbs and nouns instead, possibly reading out loud to see how it all flows. In both of these stages, you will have corrected any typos you spot. But the third stage is the actual proofread, where you take a step back from the meaning of the words and check for misspellings, poor grammar, abused commas and mysterious changes of characters’ names.

2. Taking your time
At some point in that three-stage process, you want to put your story aside for a while so you can view it afresh. And yes, this means finishing your first draft more than five minutes before midnight on deadline day. When you’re in the middle of the writing process, you often see what you intended to write rather than what you actually wrote. I always try to leave at least a few days before doing a final proofread of a short story, and I’d make it more for longer works. 

3. Changing format
These days, most people are used to doing all their work on screen. But if that’s what you’ve done so far, the final proofread would be the time when you might want to do a printout and read it on paper. If you prefer to save trees, you can use tricks such as changing the font and line spacing at this stage to fool your brain into thinking this is a new and different story and requires all your undivided attention. I tend to write in the default setting my Microsoft Word version sets you up with – Calibri 9.5 point, single line spacing, gaps between paragraphs – then switch to standard manuscript formatting for proofreading.

4. Standard formatting
Speaking of which, standard formatting tends to mean Times New Roman 12 point, double spaced, no extra space between paragraphs, the first line of each paragraph indented half an inch. But you should always double check a publisher or anthology editor’s specific instructions before submitting and do exactly what they say.

5. Know your weaknesses
I have a blind spot when the words ‘know’ and ‘now’ occur together. As in ‘I now know better’. I always have to read them twice to make sure I put them the right way round. And I can never spell ‘rhythm’. Except there, where I did because it autocorrected. Anyway, the point is to be aware of the things you tend to get wrong and double check them. For you it might be ‘there, their, they’re’ or mixing up your Arctic with your artics.